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Power Within versus Power over Others

                            Part 1 of the Trilogy

What does Power over others mean?

In short: Exercise power over others.

Of course, we know the Power over Others in war, violence, crime, fights, bullying, traffic fights, abuse and other obvious border violating actions. In those situations, there is always an offender   and a victim present. If you recognize the situation, you can acknowledge that it is nowadays becoming stronger and more powerful in our daily reality. Power over others always has to do with control, control over the other, control over the situation, control over you, control over your life.

Victims can respond by anchoring what they have experienced in who they are (their personality) and subsequently, often unconsciously, allowing it to restrict their lives. Through their restriction, the victims on their turn, can also determine their environment (Power over others). For example; “I could not protect myself as a child and now, as an adult, I am entitled to your protection. If you really love me, you do it for me”. Consequently, the other person by accepting the apparent limitation of the victim out of so-called love becomes her/himself a victim with associated consequences.

Another well-known example is that children who have been the victim of violence in their youth can grow up as offenders in their adult lives. "I have had a bad childhood" is the excuse for non-acceptable, intimidating and/or destructive behaviour. In other words, you can translate this as: "I have become an offender, but I cannot take responsibility (nor be hold responsible) for it because it has been done to me" with a corresponding tune of voice “and I’m still a victim”.

Fortunately, there are also offenders who are shaken awake because they are going to face and take responsibility for what they have done. And of course, there are also victims who face their trauma, take on their deepest fears and gradually step out of the role of victim and regain their own Inner Force.

When both the offender takes responsibility for what they have done and the victim takes responsibility for their own healing, the Power over others has disappeared. Both are then in their Power Within, their Inner Power.


How does Power over Others work for us in practice?

Perhaps to your great surprise, it is something that we were brought up with and we are hardly aware of how this also lives on in ourselves. It has become part of our lives and the idea that it could be different is almost unimaginable. Therefore, it is important to become aware by searching for ways how to recognize Power over others in your own Personality.

Consider the Personality as the person you are in this world: (i) your name with a social security number attached to it; (ii) the total of everything you have learned, what you have gained in your life, and what you have experienced, and (iii) how others see you and how you see yourself to a certain degree as a reaction to what others think of you. In short, the personality is a Avatar profile/program for our lives here on earth, suitable for functioning in the system (or Matrix) of this world.

The “creators” of this Avatar profile are all the systems (upbringing, education, healthcare, government, employers, consulting firms, youth care, justice, mental  diagnostic system), pharmaceutical industry, EU parliament, etc.) that have always told us how the world works, what is normal, what is abnormal, what is healthy, what is unhealthy, what is good for us, what is bad for us, what we have to believe and what not, and above all who we are. Moreover, the information and the power are outside of ourselves with the consequence that we have been taught (we believe it as the truth) how to function properly within the existing system, that seems to be a given fact.

The internal critic, that little voice in ourselves that criticizes our entire existence, the way we function in the system, how we look and perform, - that internal voice is Power over Self and keeps us within our given job profile. And of course, Personalities also keep an eye on each other and in line with criticism and / or the threat of sanctions when someone outside his so-called job profile starts investigating how the world might be different.

This implies that almost all Power over Others or Self from the system and in our Personality are so common that it is not recognized and experienced by Personality as weird, unusual or even bizarre. This transfer of information (compare it with programming) is passed on from generation to generation by the Personality.

Everyone wants to be "normal" and certainly not deviant. To maintain this, we sacrifice consciously and unconsciously e.g. a lot of life energy and integrity through Power over our Self. This continues until first cracks in, and subsequently, disintegration of the Personality occurs. This may manifest itself as an imbalance in health and/or overall functioning. The Avatar Profile no longer works properly (also known as mid-life crisis or burn-out) and therefore not fitting anymore in the system, and consequently, the Personality becomes useless for the system.

In western health care, too often, attention is only focused on adjusting and/or restoring the Avatar Profile so that the Personality can function again within the framework of the system. Many people also choose that because, after all; the Personality does not want to know that it is not correct, because then all frameworks fall apart, and nothing remains.

Here (of course can this be done without the above-mentioned intensive event) lays the chance to stop Power over your Self by taking responsibility for your Real Self and to dis-cover where your Own Inner Force lies. Become aware of and choose from which Power you live.

It takes some getting used to it, but very refreshing.

Film tip for Power over Others: Divergent


Power Within

How do you get to your Inner Strength, the Power Within?

We all know it, perhaps first in brief moments, but meaningfully: "You know it for sure!" A voice within yourself that encourages and confirms you to take the next step. Or in a dream or while taking a shower it suddenly becomes all crystal clear to you. A fearless knowledge based on trust. Just recall the moments of your life during which you experienced this. The Re-membering of your moment(s) of Power Within can help to use this as a new reference point for this adventure.

The Power Within is unique for everyone and at the same time the same for everyone, namely the Source from which we exist.

Your adventure is unique, in your way, at your pace with your Own Wisdom. It is an adventure that can sometimes be fierce and heavy for your Personality because all known frameworks are re-examined and questioned by you: ‘Is that so for me? And ‘Is this what I really want?’ It can provoke resistance, emotions, feeling broke, etc., but it is at the same time also very liberating!

The body also participates in this, discovering what health implies for you and how your body and especially your neurological system is being connected to your Personality. What the difference is in the reality you experience when you respond from your Personality or from your Essential Self.

You cannot make mistakes because it is a journey of discovery of “Learning on the job”. It facilitates an increased confidence to be Your Self in this world, to claim your own right to exist, and to take authority: Here I am! An exciting journey, during which you increasingly rewrite your Personality tuned to your Essential Self and the unique collaboration between the two get shape: Coming home to your Self.

The world opens up for you.

Film tip for Power Within: Hidden Figures

Niek & Jolande

Based on the blog of 21 February 2018 and revised 18 December 2019